Movies at 2 in the morning, be careful.!

Okay,

do you ever ask yourself, "what am I doing.?" Its like your screaming at yourself from inside your mind.?

It is 2 30 in the morning, and I am up asking myself.. that very question, again.! Its funny that a movie I just watched simply popped this question into my head. If you need sleep, this wouldn't be a good time to just pop in a movie. You never know what will happen after. Anyways,

I see people, and sometimes I come across people who have deeply submerged themselves into everything that weakens the heart possible.! I ask myself why, why in the world, how in the world do people find themselves in great sorrow all the time.? Do we really not see what is coming when we make certain decisions.? Are we really not strong enough.? Do we continuously, so to speak, walk with our heads down not seeing what we are getting ourselves into.!!? Yes, yes we do, and no, we are not strong enough.!! We are not strong enough to overcome this world by ourselves.! WHY.? Because it wasn't meant to be that way, for us.! We, people of this generation do not have the liberty to think that everything will be okay when we as people choose to make every wrong decision possible.! The next "thing" will not satisfy our souls and diminish our sorrows. It won't be okay when we make some of the choices we make. Life is so beautiful, but we choose to walk with our heads down, not seeing what God has created as beauty.. and we walk straight into the enemy's camp. Good job, bob.!

All this has got me to think, at 2 in the morning, that what I want to do in life is help people, not decide for people.. because that will be there choice, but for me, help people see what is beautiful. If I can consistently live an example of (there is more to life then just being alive) -and just expecting good days and bad days - , I would love to see that turn out to an inspiration for people to live for something greater.

I love what Matt Chandler said in one of his video blogs. He said, "I don't love Jesus because he makes my life better, but because Jesus is better than life!" Gosh, I'm so freaking selfish.!

That hit me home.!

.. and I could say so much more.

Fin .

Life Is A Story. By John Eldredge.

Life, you'll notice, is a story. Life doesn't come to us like a math problem. It comes to us the way that a story does, scene by scene. You wake up. What will happen next? You don't get to know - you have to enter in, take the journey as it comes. The sun might be shining. There might be a tornado outside. Your friends might call and invite you to go sailing. You might lose your job.

Life unfolds like a drama. Doesn't it? Each day has a beginning and an end. There are all sorts of characters, all sorts of settings. A year goes by like a chapter in a novel. Sometimes it seems like a tragedy. Sometimes like a comedy. Most of it feels like a soap opera. Whatever happens, it's a story through and through.

"All of life is a story," Madeleine L'Engle reminds us. This is helpful to know. When it comes to figuring out this life you're living, you'd do well to know the rest of the story.

You come home one night to find that your car has been totaled. Now, all you know is that you loaned it for a couple of hours to your teenage daughter, and now here it is, all smashed up. Isn't the first thing out of your mouth, "What happened?" In other words, "Tell me the story."

Somebody has some explaining to do, and that can be done only in hearing the tale they have to tell. Careful now - you might jump to the wrong conclusion. Doesn't it make a difference to know that she wasn't speeding, that in fact the other car ran a red light? It changes the way you feel about the whole thing. Thank God, she's all right.

Truth be told, you need to know the rest of the story if you want to understand just about anything in life. Love affairs, lay- offs, the collapse of empires, your child's day at school - none of it makes sense without a story.

The Book (Epic)

hm...

Fin ::.

What a rad past couple of weeks...

Team Conway & Team GLR (greater little rock)

Fin ::.

Love

The Beginning of a New Year.

What to think.?

Family is in town. You don't know how good that feels. It was the longest I've been away, but such a cool experience. And to see them, and to surprise them made my heart race; the anticipation of their travel to get here was so great.! I couldn't wait to surprise them at their location. ( :

4 days of this chapter left, and it hasn't really hit me till today. I'm graduating the first year of the true realization that... there is more to life. Actually putting all things to action; finding God in intimacy. Its a graduation to an orientation of the next season. A lot going through my mind... a lot to think about. But for right now, reflecting and seeing my family is a beautiful thing.

fin ::.

a challenge..

Awww.... ECO.! in the rain. This is going to be a fun week. Pray for us, there are going to be some bumpy roads ahead.

fin::.

Home, and still traveling. ...

HOME.!

Okay, I've been home for about a week from today, well will be a week tomorrow. Had a little break and then headed off to Clayton, North Carolina. Thats where I am now, working at the ARC conference at C3 church. I love it. Getting together with other 24/7's and big internships around the country and hearing amazing speakers speak such truth. There is so much opportunity in the air. But I tell you what, 24/7 is such an awesome program.! And I don't say that because I'm in I feel that I have to protect it, and now I have this sense of pride about it, but just the true rawness of it. The fact of the matter is, I am truly blessed to be here in this season of my life.

Well, I know I'm skipping like a whole month of life in Africa. I do have a little to write about that. I will share, but right now I'm in the now... and God is opening up my eyes and bringing down His love, which he always is but I'm just receiving it, and I'm loving every second of it. The good and the bad. I'll write soon...

fin ::.

welive

Next Stop, Houston, London, Africa.!

We are prepared, we are ready; trained and ready for battle.! For what is to come, we shall never be the same.. as well as many others. Redeemed, restored, renewed. Freed, loved, filled. Joy, peace, comfort. I am so excited.! My heart is full. ( :

Keep 24/7 in your prayers and for every person we cross paths with. God has a plan for his people, to know the love of Jesus Christ. "Use me until you can use me no more." I love you Lord.

Love::.

fin.

p.s. the journey.. hm..

dance all night, dance all night... & missions prep week

Missions prep, dance team... yes.! I'm on the dance team. Hip pop-anonymous.! ( :

haha,

Africa is near, less than a week away. Right now we are just prepping for what is to come. New team, different terrain, but same heart. I did learn a lot in Mexico, and not to sound like I used Mexico as a practice run, but I do believe it was preparation for when I go to Africa. I am just asking God to keep me ready. I remembered I use to pray this all the time, "God prepare me, help me to always be ready.", and I kind of let that pray in those words lay low for a little while. But I remembered that today... and that should always be my prayer. I want to be used, I want to be chosen, called... but I will have to be ready and prepared to do so, even though if I may feel inadequate.

hm...

Choosing to live fully alive I am..

Today in dance practice... I got this very quick idea to want to learn how to back flip.. I had a friend spot me because I have never done one off the ground before... Well I went up.. annnddd then I went down, on my head.! hahahaha. Ohhh, quick decisions are needed to be made wisely. No worries though.. just a stiff neck tomorrow. haha...

...

Its going to be a beautiful week... till then.

fin::.

March 27, 12:56 a.m.

I can't believe its already Friday. This week has been flying by.! Tonight, spent some good time with the team painting. I got half my face painted white and the other black... Jon Licon said, "Go Raiders.!" ha... I wish you all back at home in Florida could meet him, he is hilarious and enjoyable man to be around.! Paint in your eye brow is not a very comfortable feeling. We spent quality time throwing paint on each other than we did the room.! I really had the intention to not get any paint on me at all. That is like a goal of mine when I paint, to not get any paint on me, come out clean and paint-less. Not the case here, I got more paint on me than the wall did. haha.. not true, but sure did spend a while cleaning it off.

... God is forever faithful, and in these past few days he has really been at work within us. The encouragement my soul has been getting and the love, I am so thankful for. Tears of joy are shed along with a full heart. Thank you for all of your prayers. I pray the love of Christ to come into your lives and that you will never be the same. Don't wait on him to be captivated, search him out and go be captivated. He has so much to offer, more than you think or know. There is no lid for living a life for Christ. Its an endless journey, a beautiful journey.

One thing I am learning right now is to be extremely thankful and content with the people that I am around. The ones who are constantly in your life. No matter if they are close or just a lovely acquaintance, God has placed them across your path for a reason as he placed you for them across their path. Especially the people you will know just for a season... engage into the beauty of friendship, there is so much to gain from it.

Its raining hard. I enjoy a night rain.. Sleep well everyone. Be blessed.!

fin ::.

p.s. oh, and I can do a hand stand now and hold it for a little bit. found that out yesterday. ( : I could never do that before. haha.. I'm really liking this hip hop thing. hahaha oh my gosh, what am I doing.!? haha... My pops just laughed when I told him I was on the dance team.. I'm still laughing. ( :

'night

I desire to love ::.

"They do not love that do not show their love."

Shakespeare.

fin ::.

March 16

Oh Father, I am forever yours. Hear me sing my new song unto you. You are so faithful and lovely.

your child ::.

March 20th 1:44 a.m.

I need more of Jesus' love. I am nothing without it. I can't do, or say anything without walking in His love. Especially with people. We get so annoyed with people at times, well I know I can and have and most likely will in the future to come. But I know only my frustrations come out when I don't carry on with His love. When emotions are high, I need His love to compel to have GRACE, like he has grace with us. No matter what people say, wrong or right.. arrogant or humble like. Without love I will not succeed in my life. I learned a lot tonight, and even still I am processing a lot of it. I have a lot to learn.. it will never end. ( : My heart is heavy.. ..

: : .

Snow.!

ITS SNOWING.!!!!! ( : God, you are so beautiful. And Lovely... And Glorious.

hm..

Fin ::.

March 1st, 2009

It snowed on a beautiful Saturday evening. I have never seen it fall before. Big flakes coming from the sky. Its such a beautiful sight. Words do not describe m experience of just standing in the midst of it.. and then I started running. That was glorious.. ( : hm.. Even though it was just one night and I wish it stayed, to me it was most lovely. I wonder what made God think to create such a thing.?

The weekend has been a challenge. Things happen, sometimes not always good. But I know God has been in the work of creating something. Today I asked for a change of heart, because maybe and most likely I need a change of heart about things. Not everything is going to go my way, and not everything will I understand at the time. My faith is at the test; will I stand firm on his promises when I put my trust in him.? "God, change my heart. Help me to understand what I don't, and be patient with your timing. I feel as if I am in the middle of a cold hard war, fighting to keep the vision and the dream alive.! I need your strength, I need your power. I know I am not alone in this. Thank you for your encouragement, and the encouragement of others. Your grace is sufficient in me ."

In the middle of watching The Patriot. It is a deep movie, a lot of good views are in it. Sometimes I wish I lived back in that time. hm...

12:19 a.m. now March 2nd.

::.

p.s. my heart goes out to those who have lost their dreams. Hold on to what is precious.

"There's more to life than just being alive."

March 2nd, 2009

Goodmorning,
Its a beautiful day. There is something about getting up in the morning.. going to Starbucks and starting off the day with a little coffee and a lot of Jesus. I woke up today with a smile on my face; thank you Lord for such a beautiful cold crisp day. I do, and its so true, I live a charmed life. We all do if you really look at it. I love mornings like this.. I'm feeling creative, refreshed, joyful, alive.! Memories are lovely. ( : hm...
I heard someone say today that he was going to take his two boys up to the lake and watch the eagles fly. He said it was that time of year. Things like that sound like a great idea. I didn't mean to be nosey in listening in to his conversation, but one day I want to do simple things like that with my boys. I know this generation is called the "i" generation, technology and materials are coming out of the cuzoo, but I hope to hold on to the simple things for the rest of my life, as well as my family. God knows my heart...
I can't help to be so thankful for his provision. God provides. Not just my material things, such as the finances and needs, but the dreams and desires, the visions... The joy, the joy of being content, the patience, a change of heart. I wonder why I start to worry at times.? I can get all flustered and stressed, wishing for my mum to just hold me in her arms. ( : The brief moment my spirit is not still and in knowing that he is God I get like that. I'm not perfect, people, I just love life and am so thankful for a merciful loving God who desires to be our Father, and comforts us in times where we forget, even though it hurts him. "I love you Lord." Thank you for forgiving me.

Life Is Good.!

We Live

Fin::.

(sometime in the morning.)

p.s. i don't know when I'll write anytime soon, but just know...

that Every day is filled with new

Questions & Answers.

Dreams & Desires.

Smiles & Laughter.

And Blessings from the Heavenlies.

so,

Embrace, Love, Live.!

11:50 p.m.

: : .

Hope...

Its supposed to snow tomorrow.! Yeah.!!!!!!

Fin ::.

One of those days ...

... You just ever have those days where you are doing everything you don't want to do but nothing of what you do want to do.?  Thats been today. Today I had so much to write about, and I still do, but its just one of those things: in for the moment, then lost hopefully to be remembered.  I prayed that God will help me remember, and its not just that, its "time". Where does time go.? When we are given a short period of time we feel like we use that to its fullest, but with more time I know I feel more as if I had no time at all.  That to me is a little bit upside down.  Its procrastination, even with the things you love to do, and I hate it when I do that. 

... God has been so good, he always is and forever will be.  Today as I was praying and I was thinking about all the talents God has given me, and the question "do I use them to the fullest potential, have I tapped into any new ones.?" came to thought. I believe God is still opening my eyes to new things I never thought I could have done. That just shows that with God we can do all things and nothing is impossible with him.  But to be honest I don't think I truly use the talents God has given me to the fullest potential.  Talents are a precious gift from God, some people have similarities but then others have totally different gifts.  Its amazing to think of what God has placed in my life  that I can do.  To him shall be the glory, but also to him I shall use the precious gifts he has given me to the fullest; its a responsibility that we can so easily mess up on. 

... Lately I've been trying to write down those gifts, and I should write down those gifts.! .. and ask God what it is he has planned for me to do with them. The value of a gift from God I may never fully understand but I do know how much of a waste it is when we choose not to pursue and embrace those things he has given us.  hm...

"So many thoughts running through my mind today and at the moment. I would love to just write for hours, and then every now and then go outside and take a bike ride to clear my mind and start over again. ( :

I love life, it is a beautiful gift. "

We Live.!

august w. o. ::.

( :

happy birthday ...

: : .

its a rainy day in arkansas ...

Its lovely day in Arkansas. I'm off and its raining, reminding me of Florida. ( : I love it.

If any one would like to hear more detail of the missions trip to Mexico I would

be glad to share. Sorry I didn't go into much detail in the video bog.

Love : : .

Before Mexico.. .. message for mum.

Insanity is kicking in. The anticipation for what is to come is unreal. I'm in love with 

the unknown. Be good, no no, be lovely, swonderful, smarvelous. ( : hm... Expect & Embrace. ..

Let God be God.

love.!

august : : .

Arkansas is lovely... . video blog.

( : prayerfully yours,

august will o : : .

Its going be better than the last....

 ( :

Another year I have lived. hm.. Feels like I just got use to writing down 2008 at the top of the paper for the date. ha.. Time does really go by that fast. Makes me think, how much time is there.? There is so much I desire to do, and I mean so much its almost overwhelming. Well it can be at times. If life is considered so short, then why does God make us wait at times.? - I know there is a good answer for that - hm.?

... Its going to be better than the last I tell you.  What we learned in 2008 we bring into 2009, and now we are that much stronger prepared. Its time to get going... time to really pursue and plan instead of just dreaming away. Which it is not bad to dream, its just when it is all that you do. Going after God is going to be put to the test, but we shall still remain. No retreats, no reserves, no regrets.

... I'm blessed, very blessed. I'm so excited and ready to see change... "please God, use me until you can't use me no more.. I want to be apart in making the difference." 

Farewell 2008, hello lovely 2009. ( : Goodnight everyone, Happy New Year.! Embrace.

prayerfully yours,

august ::.